Too Many Cooks Soundtrack (2014)
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Too Many Cooks
Too Many Cooks
Too Many Cooks
Synopsis
Opening scene: Too Many Cooks.
Title text in familiar font reads "Too Many Cooks" over an idyllic American house.
Montage of television intro scenes. Soundtrack plays.
Hollywood Dad and family perform their idyllic duties.
For protracted lengths.
The phrase "too many cooks" begins to sound like gibberish. Until mercifully, the song evolves into the next theme. General theme of 80s and early-90s television-inspired characters and context.
Scene: Every "family" sitcom. Bill Cosby. Full House.
A steady introduction of characters.
Familiar archetypes of family- Father, Mother, brother and sister. Grandmother.
More abstract as they continue.
"Bully," "Cool Neighbor Kid," and eventually total strangers that cannot possibly be family.
Scene: Public service dramas.
Montage of implied heroism. Buddy-cops.
An out-of-place and thoroughly menacing figure of unwashed appearance appears in background.
Scene: GI Joe.
The menacing figure reappears amidst cartoon scenes of courage.
Scene: Dallas. Soap Operas.
The murders begin.
The unwashed villain is implicated.
Scene: Too Many Cooks
A college sorority.
Pillow fights.
The familiar song "Too Many Cooks" returns.
Along with our villain.
More murders. Increasingly detailed.
A glitch.
A victim escapes.
Fleeing from television studio. Fourth wall shattered. We're not watching a show, it's technocracy's surveillance system. This is actually happening.
Scene: Linda Carter's "Wonderwoman."
And then it's a fever dream.
And then it's a slasher film. Increasingly repulsive.
Cannibalism. Too many cooks. Who's going to do all the eating?
Scene: Star Trek and associates.
And still among them, the killer lurks.
Scene: Idyllic American Home.
Entered through a television screen.
A man: sick and feverish, surrounded by medical staff.
"You can't talk that way."
"That's your sister."
"And that's a fine 'how do 'ya do!'"
"(Laughtrack)"
The feverish sufferer babbles in television script.
A doctor concludes this is the worst case of "intronitis" he has ever seen- "you can even hear the theme music."
A nurse observers they have no idea how contagious it is...
And the tension returns.
Title text slowly starts to rise from the bottom of the screen.
The physicians have clearly contracted the patient's intronitis.
Scene: Glitch.
Quantum suicide.
The text is now the people, and the people are the text.
This is apparently painful.
Chaos and violence return.
Mortally-wounded Smarf the Cat pushes an important-looking red button.
Scene fades into birds-eye perspective.
Scene: Hollywood Squares.
Center, Smarf. It's not over.
Hollywood Dad from the sitcom of the first scene is retaking the family photo.
But now the room is filled with the characters collected from the carousel of intro scenes.
Camera shutter. Hollywood Dad transmogrifies into the grimy Killer.
Scene: Exterior of idyllic American home.
Outro music plays as the characters mingle.
Suddenly, Hollywood Dad walks through the door.
"To Be Continued..."
"Too Many Cooks" resumes playing.
